Thursday, January 20, 2005

We Always Need Grace But Sometimes We Just Realize It

This may be a commentary on myself, but I had forgotten just how hard it can be, doing God's will. I am already mentally exhausted about this R.L. thing, but don't worry, I will persevere. God gave me this job/ministry position as an answer to prayer.

I do not exagerate the following. One night over Christmas break, I felt the conviction to pray for my finances, I think primarily because my parents were a little stressed about the dollar and cent forcast. So, I asked God to bless my finances, provide for me, and stretch my money. I admited to Him that I knew that He already knew what I needed. I knew that God was my Father, loved me, and would provide for me. The next morning, I got a call from Aaron, the Resident Supervisor, asking me to come on board as a Resident Leader. God provided, just when I needed Him.

Stupid me. I said here's to a dangerous new year. Stupid me. It's sort of like asking God to humble you. DON'T DO THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But as far as asking for danger is asking to be in God's will, then I will ask again.

The following story for Nehemiah has encouraged me lately. Nehemiah had come so so far in the work God had for them. The wall of Jerusalem was nearing completion, and their enemies were scared. So the opposition ringleaders tried to get to him using those who should have been speaking on God's behalf. They pulled strings and got the prophets to go against him. This was Nehemiah's response to the sin-inciting words that Shemaiah spoke against him: I realized that God had not sent him, because of the prophecy he spoke against me. [Neh 6:12 (HCSB)]

To sum it up, I feel hurt, tired, stessed, anxious, fearful, and God only knows what else. The funny thing is, I'm not worried about the end though. I know that I am following God, I know that I'm where I want to be. I will win, but only because I'm on the Lord's side. Thank the Lord for that.

The following is where I'm at right now. Thank you Lord for
Todd Agnew and the words of encouragement you have given him.

Come ye sinners, poor and needy
Weak and wounded, sick and sore
Jesus ready stands to save you
Full of pity, love, and power

Come ye thirsty, come and welcome
God's free bounty glorify
True belief and true repentance
Every grace that brings you nigh

I will arise and go to Jesus
He will embrace me in His arms
In the arms of my dear Savior
Oh, there are ten thousand charms

Come ye weary, heavy-laden
Lost and ruined by the fall
If you tarry until you're better
You will never come at all


Hallelujah, grace like rain falls down on me
Hallelujah, all my stains are washed away, washed away

Grace is so much more than forgiveness. Boy do I know that right now.


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